My biggest fan called a few days after my birthday (August 21st by the way….where’s my gift?) and talked about my Facebook and about the fact she was babysitting.

Stalker Babysitting

Click on pic for un-cropped.

Well, my biggest fan has apparently discovered our brand new storefront studio at 17th Ave and 2nd on the Red Mile. Hadn’t heard from her for almost two weeks. This one came in today:

Stalker Window Shops

I was lamenting the fact that I don’t have anyone in Vancouver or L.A. (or any other west coast city) to call up and say in my best Interpol (from Heinrich Maneuvre) voice: “How are things on the west coast?” I decided to randomly call numbers until I got someone. It’s a pizza place on the coast of Southern California:

west-coast.mp3

It had been awhile since she called, but my biggest fan called again while I was on vacation and got Lynch when he was filling in for me: Stalker Lynch

Then when I got back, this call came in: Stalker Vacation

The Calgary Herald still owes me $2.50! There’s a newspaper box at 9th and 17th beside Nellie’s that took my money, but wouldn’t open up. I called the first time when it took my buck, and they said they’d mail it. That was a few months ago. Where’s my damn dollar!!! The next time it happened, I didn’t do anything, except grumble to myself…it was a weekend paper!

A telemarketer for the Herald called the station, and this is what happened:

Herald Call

I’d heard about services like this in the past, but usually in other cities. Well, now there’s a local number you can use at your discretion. I’m guessing it’s mostly ladies who have to deal with persistent guys.

I’m not sure I’m totally agree with using it as the first option. It’s more if the guy is super-persistent or a giant douchebag. In fact, if it’s a giant douchebag, it would be fun to use it right off the bat. For examples of douchebags check out Hot Chicks With Douchebags. Meantime, here’s the recording one hears when dialing 775-9982:

rejection-hotline.mp3

Haven’t heard from my biggest fan in almost two weeks. I’m off on vacation tomorrow, so here’s the final two calls we played this week:

Depressed Stalker Call

Thank God It’s Monday Stalker Call

Bit of a backstory for this one. I was at Beerfest on the Friday before this call. Earlier on this Monday show, I mentioned that some Paris Hilton looking girl had come into the RV. I had finished my show and spent some time in the beer area, so I was a little tipsy. This girl was with a few friends and she sat right beside me. She took out her cell phone and said that she’s gonna videotape this. She then pointed the camera toward her and I, and I jokingly said, it would be funnier if we were making out…and then it happened. We made out. I then gave her some tips on how to be a better kisser. Mostly slow it down. In any case, my “superfan” heard me talking about this on the air and called in:

Beerfest Stalker Call

Last time we spoke to her, she was sunbathing. Topless. In her front yard. On a busy street. A few days later, we get this call, The 7th:

Sunburned Stalker Call

The sixth call finds my biggest fan enjoying the sunny weather:

Topless Stalker Call